So here we are, three months (THREE MONTHS) after our beautiful Elisabeth Rose arrived. Despite the fact that a lot has happened since then and we have a ton of photos, you haven’t seen any activity on this blog since then for one very good reason – we’ve been in survival mode. We knew it was coming, of course, but the lack of sleep/free time/energy to do anything that’s not absolutely necessary has been somewhat crippling.

But we’re doing better, now. Truly we are. We are to the point where we’re seeing the first, dim glimmers of the light at the end of this first, long tunnel. We have tried really hard not to complain too much (at least to anyone but each other and family) because pretty much everyone goes through this when they have a kid. We also know that, despite our particular struggles, we have it much easier than many people do. Our little girl is a pretty easy kid most of the time and we praise God for that.

That said, I really don’t want to gloss over the challenges and struggles. That’s not what this blog is about. I don’t want to write a fictional account of our life. I want to write our true story so that, one day, someone can look back, read these words and be encouraged by our struggles. Yes, encouraged by how hard things are/were for us. We have been so blessed (and there’s no other word for it) by the stories of other people’s struggles. I hope to bless someone else that way. In order for that to happen, however, we need to be honest about the good and the bad. We need to write truth, not fiction.

So yeah, to give you an idea of what our particular journey so far has consisted of, here’s a quick round up of what’s gone down in these first three months of our precious Ellie’s life…

Elisabeth Rose Dumoulin was born on May 15th, 2013 at 7:23am. Jess has said that she’d like to write a post here detailing the delivery and birth story so I won’t go into too much detail on that. Suffice it to say that there were a few somewhat dramatic days which included us having to go head-to-head with several nurses but which ALSO included some amazing, God-sent, helping hands.

Once we were able to bring our little girl home, we had a bit of a scare as she lost a lot of weight and wasn’t eating as well as she should have. We had to get very strict about feeding schedules and we had to supplement her diet with formula which we didn’t really want to do. It was the right choice since she needed a massive influx of calories immediately, but it wasn’t an easy choice. We struggled with feeding for several weeks. We saw specialists and got our hands on special equipment and learned special training exercises for her… it was all very frustrating.

And then one of the specialists finally mentioned that there’s a thing called a submucosal tongue tie. Yes, tongue tie isn’t just a turn of phrase, it’s a real, medical thing. And it turns out that our beautiful Ellie had one. She does not now. We had an amazing experience with a Pediatric ENT office and she got all fixed up. Or at least the tongue tie was fixed. She’s still had some troubles breast feeding despite everything that we’ve done and all the time and effort that Jess, in particular, has put into it.

She’s healthy now, though – 11lbs 5oz at last weigh-in and that was quite some time ago. The doc says that she’s perfectly healthy and growing and absolutely beautiful.

So she’s doing fine… and WE’RE slowly getting there too. You know how that there’s a pop culture stereotype of the new parent, hair uncombed, shirt half tucked in, completely frazzled, exhausted, and unkempt? I always assumed that was a completely over-the-top representation for comedic effect. Yeah…

Turns out sleep deprivation is the suckiest part of all this. I don’t know that anyone had REALLY prepared me for it. Sure there were lots of, “enjoy that sleep while you can!” jokes but I sure wish someone had seriously sat me down and said, “Ok, listen – you ARE going to get some sleep but it will be broken and fragmented for several months. That’s going be a lot harder than it sounds and it’s going to very seriously change everything about life. It’s going to suck hard and there’s no way around that but here’s what to expect, here are some things to keep in mind while you’re half-dead with exhaustion, and here are some survival strategies that will help you cope. This is a real problem but it has solutions.” Instead parents seem to treat it like some sort of hazing ritual that you have to get through in order to be inducted into “club ‘rent” and that’s frankly pretty crappy.

Luckily, Jess and I are on the same page – sleep is important and the little one needs to learn how to do it effectively as soon as possible. It’s good for her and it’s good for us and it’ll make us better parents. And you know what? Three months in and she’s mostly sleeping through the night in her own room without too much issue. Take THAT parental fraternity. Everyone in this family is sleeping pretty great at night and that’s awesome.

And that’s the main takeaway here – that, despite the struggle, there are victories and our itty-bitty Dumo is an amazing kid. Every kid has their moments and Ellie has had some pretty major meltdowns that left us completely wide-eyed and breathless… but they are the exception, not the rule and that’s a huge blessing.

We love her and she’s fantastic… despite how difficult this whole thing has been.